Winter Howl (Sanctuary) Read online

  “A bullet won’t kill me,” he said.

  “Maybe. If I don’t hit you in the head. But it’ll stun you long enough for me to stab you. And that will kill you.”

  The smile was beginning to become more genuine as he came closer. One more step, and she would have to do something. As long as he didn’t…

  His dark eyes ran over her body, dwelling like claws, appreciating the picture of such a vulnerable little girl holding a big gun. His cock began to twitch.

  “Just when I think I know you, you surprise me. I like it.” He began to reach for the gun. He should have just swiped it away from her, but she took a step backward, angled the gun slightly away from him, and pulled the trigger. The kickback made her hit the wall, and she did not think she was ever going to hear again. The benefits of actually shooting the gun were that Grant knew she was serious, and that she woke up everyone else, every single one of them eager to see Renee kick him out.

  Grant stumbled back, hitting the bed with his calves. Renee might not go out and hunt, but she did know how to shoot. After Jake had finished teaching himself, Renee had asked him to teach her. She had not practiced in two years, but she went through the motions as though it had been yesterday. She popped the shell casing, then cocked it again, pointing it straight at Grant’s chest.

  “Still like it?” she asked.

  He stood straight again, but for the first time, his nakedness made him seem as vulnerable as she must seem to him. “I don’t understand.” But she knew he understood perfectly.

  “My answer is no,” she said. “I don’t want to be a werewolf. I don’t want to be the bitch in your pack. And I don’t want you endangering anyone else up here with your behaviour. You need to leave. Now. If you have anything you’re attached to, send me a postcard, and I’ll mail it to you.” She pushed herself off the wall with her stinging shoulder blades and began to advance on him.

  He bared his teeth—silver and sharp. He was beginning to change.

  “And if I feel even a little bit threatened by you, I will shoot. You, this time. I swear.”

  “You actually think you had a choice?” he snarled, the claws lengthening over his nails. But that was as far as he went. His muscles did not shift, and he did not begin to sprout fur. What he did was back away to the door. It opened from behind him, hitting his ass and making him scramble to the side so that he did not have his back to an enemy. Jake and Britt were the first to appear in the darkness of the hall, then Malcolm, Max, and Ki. Renee was fairly sure that Leslie would be at the back, watching but not prepared to engage. She was also fairly sure some of the other shapeshifters would be trying to make their way to the log home after hearing the gunshot, but the weather would probably be enough to deter some of them.

  “You had me in your bed, and you knew what I was,” he growled. His voice had dropped about an octave, growing guttural and rough. “What could have possibly changed your mind? Do you really want to be the only one here without the magic I’ve shown you?”

  “I can live with that,” Renee said. She continued to advance, and Grant stumbled out into the hall, avoiding the shapeshifters who would attack if he touched Renee or them. Renee followed him out, but when Grant opened the front door, she realised that although he could survive the weather, she could not possibly walk out there without getting frostbite. Jake put his hand carefully on her shoulder.

  “I can take that,” he said.

  She shook her head. “Someone get some clothes and my coat,” she said. “I’m going out there.”

  Britt ran up the stairs to the loft to get her what she needed. She gave Jake the gun only to put the sweatshirt and pants, shoes, and coat on. Grant refused to budge from where he stood, as if waiting intently for some kind of advantage.

  Then she took the rifle back and forced Grant out onto the porch, then into the field.

  His eyes burned red. “I will have you, Renee. That was never a question. You’ll run with me.”

  She did not even bother telling him that he had given her the choice. She just kept the gun trained on him.

  They heard voices from the other shapeshifters heading towards the cabin, and that was when Grant turned and ran.

  Renee did not even stop to think. She dropped her shoulder, keeping a hold on the gun, and began to run after him. Jake and Britt had to change into their dog forms in order to run alongside her.

  After years of running with the dogs herself, she had good speed and endurance, the air frigid and fresh and sharp in her lungs. She slipped once or twice in the snow and lost track of Grant now and then, but he was using the driveway, and she did not have to work to find him again. When they finally reached the gate, he undid the latch and pulled it open. He closed it on himself and watched as Renee closed the lock, then set the security code so that it would not open again for four hours, with no exceptions. He stared at her heatedly, his muscles finally changing and the fur running over his skin like water.

  “I’m what you need,” he hissed with the last of his human vocal chords. He ran into the woods, ostensibly away from the sanctuary.

  When Jake and Britt changed into human form, practically freezing in the process, they moved close to Renee, hugging her as much for warmth as for reassurance.

  “You know he’s coming back,” Britt said. “He’s not going to just leave.” Neither she nor Jake said anything like, “I told you so,” or that they had been right all along. Because Renee had been right, too—she had never doubted that Grant was going to have to leave the sanctuary. The only question had been whether she was going to leave with him.

  “I know,” she said. “We have to get all the dogs. It may be tomorrow, it may be the next day, but the next thing he’ll try for is one of the dogs. And then he’ll try for one of you. So you all need to be ready, and we need to get all the dogs locked in their barn. Tonight, if we can.”

  Britt nodded at Jake, and he went ahead to get the other shapeshifters to work together to get the dogs in. Most of the dogs stayed inside during this kind of weather, but a few of them were more open-air than others, and those were the ones who would be vulnerable to Grant’s attack.

  Renee let Britt hold her a little while longer. Britt’s feet must have been turning blue, and Renee could feel her shaking from the cold, but Britt did not seem to want to let go, knowing that Renee had chosen them over what Grant offered. And some part of Britt must have known that Grant had offered Renee something that Renee believed had great value.

  Finally, Britt changed into her far more practical form, circling around Renee as she made her way back to the home, making sure nothing came at her. The malamute was snuffling with the effort to not miss a single whiff of werewolf that got into Britt’s olfactory range. Renee did not run back up the hill, but she was not walking slowly. She did not think that Grant would come right back for her, but she was still jumpy, ready for doors to be locked and lights on. She had not thought much further than threatening him off the property.

  She tightened her fingers around the rifle, clinging to it. Her one defence against anything that came after her. The shapeshifters and dogs had their teeth, and Grant had everything he could possibly have to be dangerous. His body was a weapon. But all she could do was hope that a bullet slowed Grant down long enough for her to infect him with silver, presuming that he could not just knock the knife away from him when he was in terrible pain from a bullet wound, and presuming that she could shoot him where it would hurt. She was a good shot, but it was easy to shoot a bull’s-eye when there was nothing making her nervous. Those were the best possible conditions. Someone like Grant, who inspired deeply ambiguous, torn feelings within her, and who was wickedly violent when he wanted to be… It was understandable that Renee might not shoot him well enough when the shot counted.

  Britt’s hackles were still raised as they reached the house. Leslie held some winter clothes in his hands. Jake had told him to give them to Britt. Britt brought the clothes into the house with her and changed in the
warmer living room. Renee went to put on more clothes than the basics she had, then grabbed a few more outfits, unsure how long they would have to stay in the barns before Grant made his move and came back.

  * * * *

  At the very least, some of them would have to go back and forth between the shapeshifter barn and the dog barn. The dog barn was not set up to be hospitable to the shapeshifters who preferred their human shape to sleep in, and besides, the dog barn was already crowded when it was just the dogs living in it. Also, the dog barn did not have a kitchen.

  Renee stayed with the dogs, while her shapeshifter pack split into two groups, one to help protect Renee and the dogs, and the other to make sure that the other shapeshifters were okay and knew what was going on.

  The weather wasn’t helping. The snow was back, so although the biting wind of the day before was gone, the cold only seemed to be getting worse. The snow had built up between the barns so that moving from one place to the other was difficult, and they could not always see their surroundings.

  The dogs were restless, and they knew that the people around them were stressed. They barked at nothing, paced near the door, peed in corners, and begged to go out and relieve themselves. The shapeshifters took them out a few at a time throughout the day, but without their usual exercise and freedom, the dogs became overexcited or belligerent.

  Renee had not showered in two days. She smelt like dog, slept on one of the couches with at least three dogs near her, plus Britt, who stayed in dog form most of the time. Two days, and they had not heard anything. Jake, Malcolm, Max and Ki shuffled to and from the shapeshifter barn, bringing food for the rest of them, keeping a lookout, and asking the other guards if they had seen anything.

  What if Grant was basically going to wait them out? Maybe he would wait until they came out of their own accord, sure that he was really gone. It would take too long to starve them out, but Renee could see them getting cabin fever if things stayed this tense for much longer. Dogs weren’t meant to be cooped up, and Renee could not stay away from the world outside forever. There were things that needed to be done, an organisation that needed to be run. She couldn’t stay. But how long could they stay like this? Was Grant patient enough to wait? Or would he crack before they did?

  * * * *

  It was midnight on the fourth day in. Renee, who had had a hard time leaving the log home for months after her father had died, was ready to get out of the barn. She could not get comfortable on the couch, tossing back and forth and disturbing the dogs around her. She wondered whether anyone had contacted the sanctuary. She wondered if anyone would even notice if there was radio silence from them. She wondered if Detective Ebon would notice, and if he had found anything from his search around her perimeter. Most of the barn was dark to simulate night, but they kept lights on in the loft so that they could see if they had to move about.

  There was a loud, sharp thud on the barn door, familiar. Renee jerked straight up, and all the dogs began barking. Now that they were awake, they could smell something that made their hackles rise. Renee stood up and headed towards the door.

  “No, don’t go near it,” Jake said, striding past her and putting himself between the door and her. “You think we’ve been keeping you in here for your health?”

  Malcolm, Max and Leslie came up behind them and joined Jake at the door. Max held the crude bayonet that Renee had made, his face unusually grim. Ki would not be going out with them—she was Renee’s size soaking wet. The only reason Max was going out was because he was big enough in human form. And the only reason Leslie was going out was because he was big enough in dog form. However, he looked terrified.

  “We’ll come back in and tell you what it is,” Jake reassured her. Britt touched Renee’s hand with her muzzle, and Renee jumped. “Just stay in here. Promise me.”

  She did not promise anything. Her entire body was shaking inside out from the cold, but she could not help but remember that Grant had wanted to show Jake what a real alpha could be. She had come to the thought then, but she was not aroused now, and instead remembered with foreboding.

  The four went out, Leslie in his dog skin, closing and locking the door behind them. Renee listened hard beyond the barking, but she could not hear anything. She looked down at Britt, whose ears were trained on the door, but Renee could not tell if Britt could hear anything either. Ki was going around trying to calm the dogs down, but although their barking began to subside, they were still more restless than usual, running along the walls and pawing at the dry dirt floor as though trying to get out. Their ears and tails were erect and tense.

  Renee did not even realise just how tense she was until the shivering in her neck hurt and her hands protested being clenched so tightly. She kept expecting Grant to burst in through the doors. She kept feeling his teeth on her, tasting her, preparing her for the real thing. Although he was hardly a restrained person, he had forced himself to wait until she told him to bite her, and now it felt as if she was only a hair’s breadth away from being changed against her will. She was terrified for herself and her friends, but what felt even worse was that she would not have given up the last two months for anything. She hated and loved and wanted Grant all at once, and she didn’t know whether, when the time came and he leaned over her with his teeth bared, she would fight too hard.

  Her legs locked as she heard two screams—one of which might have been a howl—and a gunshot, then nothing. She thought she would fall, but her body was paralysed. Britt transformed back into human form and ran naked to the door, unlocking it and pulling it open. She was halfway through the change back into a dog, but then Jake and Max carried a bleeding Malcolm—in human form—into the barn. Leslie ran in after them, transforming back to human skin, pushing Britt back and locking the door. His normally placid face was drawn and white, his mouth a dark gash on his face.

  Ki came running over, clearly thinking her Max was hurt at first, but after seeing that he was okay—if scared and furious—she ran to get a first-aid kit. Renee helped clear off one of the couches and kept the dogs from sniffing at the wound in Malcolm’s leg.

  Malcolm was staring at the ceiling, his face slack as he clutched at the wound in his leg. His dark eyes were glazed.

  “I got off a shot, and I got the bastard. But not good enough. He bit Malcolm,” Max said, throwing the rifle on the ground, too angry to care about gun safety. “The wolf bit him when Malcolm was human. Goddamn it.”

  Renee gently pulled up Malcolm’s pants leg. Malcolm winced as the fabric pulled away from the wound, but he didn’t say anything. The bite was still bleeding, and while it looked shallow, it had done its trick. Grant did not have to kill one of Renee’s pack in order to destroy his life.

  “So…what does that do?” Renee asked. She did not make a habit of asking questions to which she already knew the answer, but she just had to hear it out loud.

  “If he had bitten Malcolm’s dog form, it would have hurt like hell,” Jake said. “But that’s all it would have done. But Malcolm was human. Which means that, come next full moon, he’ll transform into a wolf. I don’t know whether he even has his canine form anymore. I don’t know how this works.” He collapsed on the couch next to Malcolm, clenching his hands into fists and hitting his thighs with them. Ki ran over with an open first-aid kit, and Max helped her dress the wound. Malcolm just let them do whatever they wanted, neither helping nor hindering.

  “But you shot him. You shot Grant,” Renee said to Max.

  “I hit his stomach,” Max said. He put pressure on the wound as Ki began wrapping gauze around the calf. “But it would take a direct hit to the heart or head, I think, to slow a werewolf down. Or the fucking knife, but he wouldn’t let me get close enough.”

  Leslie staggered over, his coordination limited through his shock. He held out a wallet. The wallet was blood-stained and left Leslie’s hand red. “There was a body,” Leslie said. “He threw a human body at the door. That’s what made the noise. We didn’t recognise who i
t was, but it was hard to really see…what he once looked like. His face…”

  Renee took the wallet slowly. If it was not one of her shapeshifters, there were only so many people Renee knew—and with whom Grant had seen her interact. Even before she opened the wallet to see the dead man’s driver’s licence, she somehow knew.

  Ki climbed onto the couch next to Malcolm and held him, just giving him something to feel even if he did not react to her presence. Renee also wanted to reassure him, but she had nothing to reassure him with, since the situation was her fault to begin with. Instead, she walked around the couch and stepped a few feet away, distancing herself even though she knew that was probably the worst way to respond to Malcolm’s problem.

  She opened the wallet. She had been right. There was a photo of Josh Beall on his driver’s licence, a few years younger than he had been when she’d last seen him, but recognisable. She also found a Visa credit card, car insurance documents, and sixty-seven dollars in cash, plus change.

  By the time she dropped the wallet, her hands had become even more stained. She did not have to be a shapeshifter to smell the blood, as strong and fresh as it was now. Renee toed a dog away from sniffing the wallet, then forced herself to pick it up and throw it in one of the sinks on the wall.

  Then she strode over to the couch and picked up the rifle from where Max had thrown it. She found the box of bullets near the sink and reloaded it full. She was halfway to the barn doors when both Britt and Jake whirled her around.

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Britt asked, at the same time that Jake yelled, “No way you’re going out there!”

  “This didn’t have to happen,” Renee said. “He wants me. That’s all he wants.”

  “So you’re just going to go out there with a gun and try and shoot him before he bites you?” Britt asked. “Seriously? Have you gone crazy?”

  “He’s fast,” Jake said. “And it’s both a blackout and a whiteout out there. You can’t see anything, but he doesn’t need to see well to find you. God, I don’t even know why he let us come back in here. He could have slaughtered us all.”